A little SPUNK never hurt anybody

Friendships

2011-11-05T03:57:00.000-07:00

There's so much I want to say, but I'm not sure how to say it. I'm much better at writing my feelings down then saying them. Always have been.

In high school I was (thought I was) close good friends with these two girls (no need for mentioning their names) Well you remember how people would have a notebook that they would share and write notes to each other in? Well they both had one with each other and one with me. I was terrible at writing notes. Tom-boy Amanda thought notes weren't that important. Very seldom did I ever write one. Well one day after school (we all road the same bus home) one of the girls asked me to hold on to her notebook that she shared with the other girl. I didn't think much of it. I just tossed it into my bag and got off the bus. Well later that night I was doing homework and discovered that I still had their notebook. I was curious about the things they would write to each other, so I peeked inside. BIG MISTAKE!!!! Let me just say that there was a lot of mundane things said about how their days had been and what not, but then there was a few things said that involved me. I was a bit heart broken to hear what they had to say about me behind my back. Well that was about the time I stopped considering all my "So called friends" at the time, friends. After that day I only had a handful of people that I truly considered friends. Those girls weren't on the list.

I tell you that story to help clarify something that has been very hard for me to cope/deal with over the past 7 years. After high school I didn't keep in contact with a lot of people. In fact for 3 years straight I didn't have any friends that I would hang out with. Camille was the only one that I kept in contact with, but even that was rare, and then she got married :) So even rarer after that. When I joined the Church and was Baptized I was given so many blessings. One of those Blessings was friendship. I know that I have my moments when I don't talk to anyone for a few days or even a week or months, but I hold special places in my heart for ALL my friends. When you've experienced as I have the lack of friendship in your life, you can see and understand why I sometimes behave the way I do when it comes to our friendship. I'm quite selfish. A little possessive. Sometimes controlling. Annoying, and to needy. My only defense that I have to all those is that I'm terrified of not being wanted as a friend and of losing you all. My lifeline is my friendships. I lean so much onto them for support with everything in life because I'm literally terrified that I will be without you all. Its a scary thought to be able to remember a time when you had no one at all to talk to, to laugh with, to cry with, to experience new exciting things with. It wasn't fair that I felt that I wasn't good enough to be friends with anyone because of what was written about me in a dumb notebook. The sad thing is still to this day I have those moments of self-doubt. I do love my friends with a vengeance. And will hold on to them as tightly as I can. Its not weird its a sweet kind of love. So if I ever become a little paranoid that you don't want me as a friend please tell me to shut up and remind me that I'm AWESOME. I need it so much.

Answered prayers

2011-09-13T16:07:00.001-07:00

This post is not very long. I was just thinking a lot about prayers. I've heard a lot of prayers and I've said a lot of prayers. I sometimes forget the prayers that I've said and have heard. Have you ever listened closely to an opening prayer or even a closing prayer or a blessing of food? Have you felt nervous giving one? My favorite thing about praying is that its not only for my benefit, but for the benefit of others as well. I especially love it when I hear about a prayer being answered. Prayers are answered every day. Not only prayers, but the questions that were not verbalizing in our prayers or even in our day-to-day life. I like to think that as we grow in life that we have opportunities to be answers or to answer the prayers of others. Whether they are close to us or not and whether we realize it or not. Many prayers that I've had have been answered through friends, The Spirit, through Church leadership, and even through strangers. The key thing to remember is that Heavenly Father does hear our prayers and he provides for us to hear his answer. We just have to be ready to listen when we hear it.

Someone Like You

2011-08-29T15:56:00.000-07:00

This song has helped me so much!!! I absolutely love the lyrics and can say after listening to it just once feel pretty darn good about life.

I heard
That you're settled down
That you
Found a girl
And you're
Married now

I heard
That your dreams came true.
Guess she gave you things
I didn't give to you

Old friend
Why are you so shy?
Ain't like you to hold back
Or hide from the light

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
"Don't forget me", I begged
"I'll remember", you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead."
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead,
Yeah.

You know how the time flies
Only yesterday
It was the time of our lives
We were born and raised
In a summer haze
Bound by the surprise
Of our glory days

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over.

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
"Don't forget me", I begged
"I'll remember", you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead."

Nothing compares
No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made.
Who would have known
How bittersweet this would taste?

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you
"Don't forget me", I begged
"I'll remember", you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead"

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
"Don't forget me", I begged
"I'll remember", you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead"

"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead"

Someone Like You- By Adele

Update!!!

2011-08-22T16:21:00.000-07:00

Sorry it's been awhile. Been pretty busy. Lest see, I've been working a lot and I will soon be working even more. I'm going to start doing private care. My goal is to not get burnt-out. That would suck.

I have 2 new nieces!!!Gracie mae(May 22nd), and Jemma Yvonne(July 3rd (pictures soon) They are both beautiful. We are patiently awaiting the arrival of the little man that's known as "Harley" He is due December 6th. My Brother Jeremy and his wife Mindy are very excited.

My other niece and Nephews are living with their real mom. I was, a few years ago, very against this. But she is fortunetly doing 100% better than my Brother Jason. I miss having them around though. They like their new school and seem to be doing pretty good.Thats all that matters.

There really isn't anything to exciting going on right now other than hanging out with friends and Church stuff. If anything exciting happens I will let you all know!!!

Growing!!!

2011-06-05T23:33:00.000-07:00

So I was told today that I've grown. My first response was that I had been on vacation and was allowed to eat ALL that I wanted. (very funny, I know) But she meant that I've grown more mature and that I seem to be clear headed and humble. I, at first, thought that she meant I no longer acted like a teenager, but she said that we all have 2 sides. A good side, a bad side, a future and a past. And if I'm to love someone that means I need to embrace both sides of a person. I think I'm trying to do that with more than one person. Think about it, we love our family, friends, our pets, and even our neighbors. My challenge to everyone is simply said, are you willing to embrace both sides of a person who you love? I would hope to think that most everyone would say "YES" but there are a few people who forget that no one is PERFECT that people make mistakes all the time and its up to them to learn from those mistakes. It doesn't matter if someone has a good side or a bad side. What matters most is that we are all willing to not pass judgment onto others especially when we ourselves don't want to be judged. I just ask that everyone try their hardest to look past the good and bad side's of people. We are all told to be a friend to everyone no matter what. That means, even if someone doesn't be a Friend to you, that you keep being a friend to them. Someone once said that they will only put forth effort into a relationship/friendship if the other person does too. Well God says differently and when he said "love one another" it didn't mean you pick and choose who, it means that you forgive and forget and love. So look beyond the good and bad side and see the person within.

Life in Question

2011-06-05T23:08:00.000-07:00

So I was thinking the other day that life has always been filled with non-stop questions. Here are a few that have either stuck with me or I have asked over the past few years, months, weeks, days, and hours.

Years: What do I want to do for a profession?
Why don't I have any friends?
(and my not so favorite, favorite)
When will I find my one true love?
Months: Why do I believe in the Book of Mormon?
Why does everyone look at me funny?
What do I need to do to find an Eternal Companion?
Why is being a girl have to include drama?
Why do I say I'm fine when I'm not?
Why do I let them get the best of me?
Weeks: How many more days until my cruise?
When will Cody be home?
Do you think I bought to much clothes for my trip?(answer was yes)
Why do guys think that just cause a girl says hi to them that the girl now likes them?
Why are boys so dumb?
Is being done with guys a good thing or a bad thing?
Why in the world do I let them get the best of me?
Days: Really?
Can I please feel comfortable with myslef?
Why can't I get enough of you?
Why do I not stand up for myself and others?
Who cares if you cry yourslef to sleep?
Why do you let them get to you?
Why does no one understand you?
Hours: Mabe I should learn a new language?
Will it hurt more to break ties or to try and mend them?
Why do you allow people to manipulate you?
Why do you allow people to tell you how you feel?
How come you never stick up for yourself?
How does it feel to let people walk all over you?
Why do you not think your beautiful?
(AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE's)
What if your not good enough for him?
What if they hate you?
What if she thinks your no longer worth being a friend to?
What if it doesn't hurt when this is all over?
What if he never realizes how amazing you really are?
What if your to late to come to a compromise?
What if you weren't meant to be closer than you are?
What if you were wrong?
What if you were right?
What if no one ever understands what your trying to say and who you are?
What if none of this was worth it?

6 months worth

2011-03-17T02:24:00.000-07:00

September- Was the last time I actually blogged about something. And it was the beginning of me being depressed. How horrible it is for me to type that, but its the truth. I know I hurt a lot of peoples feelings when I stopped talking to them and stopped being a friend. I can now say that I'm sorry. I don't remember much of...
October- I think the most fun I had was making a tutu for my Halloween costume. It turned out super cute. I was a witch. Also I had a lot of fun shopping with my friends and helping them find their costume.
November- Was when I hit the lowest of low. I listened to a friend of mine that wasn't LDS. She told me some things that got me to think and I was already having some doubts about certain things and I just fell. That's the best way that I can put it. I fell hard and it took a long time for me to get back up again. I had to dig deep and to actually seek help. I hated every minute of it. I don't like depending on other people. I'm capable of it, but I don't think I should take advantage that way. Heavenly Father was of course the best and most dependable of all. I'm a convert and when someone says something that makes sense in a weird way it can make you turn on everything that you believe in. Thank goodness I have the best friends in the whole world!!! Their support and their friendship helped me stand tall.
December-Made me realize that I'm not a big fan of crowds and this past December was filled with family. Now I know its family, but I love my quiet life. I felt so crowded. I had Grandparents and Brothers and Sisters and Cousins everywhere. I'm very glad that its over and that Christmas only comes but once a year!
January 2011- I turned 25! And yeah I feel older. Its not a bad older just older. My friends helped me to celebrate. I started a diet and can you believe it??? I've stuck with it and plan to keep to it for many many many months/years. I never knew getting in shape and becoming healthy could be so rewarding.
February- Yeah Valentine's day came and went. Pretty boring actually, except that Me and 4 other SINGLE girl friends are gonna go on a CRUISE!!!! It will be from May 30Th-June 3rd. The plan is to leave 2 days before and spend some time at the beach in Cali. Yeah that's right the BEACH. The very place I've never been. I'm really excited and very happy.
March- Work seems to fill my time these days but I'm grateful and happy to do it. I'm saving most of my money for the very much exciting CRUISE.

All in all its pretty safe to say that life hasn't been boring. I've been pretty busy and there is no telling when I will be on again. Just know that I'm grateful to have so many dear friends in my life and that my family is important to me even though they can crowd me sometimes. Also that I know with out a doubt that Heavenly Father loves me and that the Book of Mormon is true. Pretty simple words, but there true and mean a lot to me. Its been a long time since I was truly happy with my life and even though I have my ups and downs, I'm grateful for the experiences that I've had and for the people that have stuck by me. I chatted with a friend the other day for the first time in a very long time and she made me sad. Just chatting with her brought so many repressed feelings that I regretted getting in touch with her. I've changed a lot in the past few years and it was very apparent to me after that chat with her. Our lives went in 2 different directions and I know she is happy where she is and I hope she knows that I'm happy where I am (for now). I will always consider her a friend even if were not close anymore. I hope someone reads this and thinks that what I say is somewhat interesting. If you noticed there wasn't anything mentioned of a boy??/ That's cause there isn't one to mention. I hope that one day there will be and whenever there is I will surely blog about him.

So...

2010-09-08T13:15:00.000-07:00

The truth is, I'm giving DOUBLE truth's today because Krissa wants them :)

The truth is, I love being a hermit! I can go days even weeks without talking or hanging out with my friends. Its more like a love hate thing. I'm trying to not be a hermit cause I need to get out and do things other than work and church.

The truth is, I love reading. Hence me being a hermit. I can get lost in a book or a series of books for days and weeks. In fact I've taken time away from reading to type this.

The truth is, I'm really shy. There are somethings that I can do and then there are some things that I can't. Like ask boys out on dates, yet, I can tell them that I like them or am interested in them. My shyness comes out when I'm around 1-3 people. If I'm with a huge group for some reason it goes away. Weird!

The truth is,I'm really happy that my parents have finally listened to me and they got rid of the wood floors in the kitchen, dinning room, and hallway :) I hated the color of wood and it just never seemed to fit for me. Now there is TILE.

The truth is, I really want to go back to school. I find it interesting how when your not in school you want to go, but when in school your counting down the days until the weekend.

The truth is, I'm deathly afraid of snakes. Like seriously afraid. For some reason they scare me like crazy. I've had a few encounters with them and they have never appealed to me.

The truth is, I love my car. I need to post a few pics on here for you all to see. Her name is Gigdette to me she looks like a little Gigdette :)

The truth is, I don't like playing sports with a bunch of guys. They are ball hogs or frisbee hogs. They never pass it to girls.

The truth is, I don't like getting on facebook that much anymore. I never do anything except post a new status and look at what everybody else is posting. Very boring.

The truth is, I love to be outside in a rainstorm. I love the smell of wet dirt and I wish someone was able to put that smell in a candle or an air freshener. I love it.

The truth is, Sometimes I don't blog because I don't think anyone reads what I post.

I hope you enjoy!!!

The Truth is....

2010-08-26T08:32:00.000-07:00

So I don't want so much to post a bunch of things that I want to tell you all today, but I do want to post mainly the only truth that has been weighing on me for the past few weeks.

The truth is... I have a friend and she doesn't really include me in her life anymore. She used to. But for a while now she hasn't and its really sad because we once were really close. I know that people drift apart and that is just normal progression, but it doesn't change the way it all makes me feel. This summer has brought a lot of change to me and I know that its all for the good. I've been given so many blessings in such a short time that I might've been to busy to notice if I had offended or caused her pain too. I guess the hardest thing with friendships are the fact that no matter how strong you think your bond is, it doesn't compare to the will of the Lord. I would hate to believe that Heavenly Father would want me to not be friends with her, but if its what I need or what she needs then, I would deal with it. Its so hard to say goodbye to a close friend, a friend whome I love very much. I do hope though that we are able to remain friends.

That is my truth post for today. Some may like it and some may not, but its my blog and I can write all that I want and about all that I want!!

So its another....

2010-07-28T17:06:00.000-07:00

I love oatmeal raisin scented candles and yup, I'm burning one right now!!!! It like eating one without actually eating it and not over induldge myself. I know I'm a genius :)

The irritating little puppy ate the back of my favorite flatts off! And now I have to go shoe shopping, and that brings me to my next truth.

I hate shoe shopping!! So ever since I broke my heel 2 years ago, my left foot is about 1 size bigger than my right! And that makes shoe shopping very sad and dumb and irritating. Hate it!!!

But I do love kissing in the rain.(Haven't done it for a number of years)But the last time I had been kissed it was in the rain and it became something that I really look forward to doing again. Hopefully soon I can, not getting my hopes up, but it would be a lot of fun :)

2010-07-14T16:09:00.000-07:00

So today I got off work at 6am and I told myself that I was only to sleep for 5 hours since I don't have to work tonight, well I slept for 9 Its so irritating!!!! I really do want to sleep at night when I'm off of work.

I come home from work and each morning I have to clean up shredded paper all over the house because my little puppy loves to shred paper.

I'm not very fond of Mexican food. I will eat it if its in front of me, but I wont go looking for it. My entire life, I had to eat what the family was eating and not really have a say in it, but now I'm confident enough to be able to say "no thanks" when Mexican food is on the menu.

In 2 days it will be a whole year since my foot surgery. Time really has flown by fast this past year. So many changes and so many memories. I will post more and even put a picture or two up for y'all.

A many things that ticked me off this past month are....

2010-06-23T13:17:00.000-07:00

So over the past month there has been so many things that have ticked me off. And not just a little, but a lot. So I decided to blog about it all.

3 friends got engaged. It made me mad cause I really want to be married and to start that part of my life. I know, I know, Its in Heavenly Father's time. I know!!
My brother Jason decided that he was going to move out and take the kids with him. He started a bunch of drama and to be honest, He could have done it in a manner that didn't show that he wasn't ready or mature enough for the change. I've raised those 3kids for the past 4 years and in a lot of ways they are like my own. If your a mom you know the feelings that come over you when your children are threatened. And that's how I felt, like he was putting them in danger.
His girlfriend who he wants to move the kids in with is stupid. And I'm not being mean when I say that. She really is stupid and I've tried for over a year to teach her basic things about kids and what not. She is 30 and has 3 kids of her own and doesn't know how to shop for groceries or to clean her apt. Her kids treat her like crap and they will turn out just like her.
My mother of course has been pushing my buttons. Now that I have a job and I'm working she feels that its her given right to make me give her almost my entire pay check. Yeah. Its not like I make a whole lot and she thinks for some reason that I have no other use for it than to pay bills. I have a budget and in my budget I would like to save a lot of money each month and if she keeps taking it I wont have any to save. Its like a trick to get me to stay in her control cause she has every other sibling of mine in her control no matter where they are. Sucks I know.
Someone broke my prescription glasses. I now only had one pair cause the dog somehow ate my favorite about 2 years ago. Now I have to contact my insurance company and get a new set. I hate going to the eye doctor.
I hate liking boys or even being interested in them. None of them like me and that sucks. I'm not ugly. I'm not skinny, not gorgeous, but I'm fun, pretty, outgoing, honest and spiritual. What more could a guy want?

Even though there are a lot of things that ticked me off there have been some really good ones too. Such as

I got a new job and started working. Its interesting and fun and its what I've always done and loved. So YAY to me.
With my brother Jason's plans to move the kids in with him and his girlfriend, that means that I will have time to do things that I haven't had time to do in over 4 years because all my plans have been centered around the kids. So I'm excited for change.
I'm learning and doing really good at it to gain some self control on everything in my life. I hope that I can continue to have it.
Even though I was ticked over 3 of my friends getting engaged and not me, I'm also very excited for them. And I'm maid of honor to one of them, And that's AWESOME!!

I have goals and I'm reaching them. Everything that's happened over the past month is what Heavenly Father wants for me. Everything feels so right and I love that. So life is moving on and I seem to be moving on with it.

Truth is....

2010-05-05T13:00:00.000-07:00

I once had over 100 porcelain dolls, some were even clowns. And now thy kind of creep me out. Every time I see one I think there constantly staring at me and are going to kill me.

I really am sick of living with my parents, Its so sad. I'm really ready to get out on my own or with a bunch of girls or with the man of my dreams....

I push people away like crazy. Its not that I don't like them or not want to be around them, Its the fact that they are to close to me as in they know a lot about me and I'm comfortable with them around that they just seem like they are supposed to be there. I feel stupid and very sad at what I did once its done. Good thing I'm working on it!

I hate Mexican food! I really do. I only eat it cause thats whats for dinner or where were going to eat.

Thats the truth!!

What's new with me ,you ask? Well....

2010-04-28T09:50:00.000-07:00

So I've decided to go back to school :) It may take a while cause of the registration fee, but I really hope to be enrolled in the fall semester. My end goal is to be a RN. So I'm gonna be taking a few classes that pertain to nursing. My first step is to be a Phlebotomy's!!! Wish me luck-

I have started to work out again and to diet. My eating habits have changed a lot and I'm glad :) I've already lost 5 lbs and hope to keep losing. Its the only thing in my life that I ever want to lose :)

I'm looking for a more reliable job. The one I have now only gives me a few hours a month and I need more than that. I have been on call for a few weekends but because the economy is so bad no one can afford to lose a day of work, so I just get an on-call check, which isn't very much, but It helps to pay my phone bill.

I've been talking to my Brother 's (Jason) girlfriend about joining the church and she seems interested :) I'm excited lol I'll let ya know how it goes!!

So that's what I've been up to lately!!!

Foggy...Just a bit!

2010-03-11T20:46:00.000-08:00

Life can be a bit foggy sometimes and what I mean by that is, we can forget about what is going on right in front of us and it can be a bit annoying to everyone cause it makes everyone think your not paying attention or that your upset or that you just don't care. Well I have experienced the foggy feeling and instead of it lasting just that one day it lasted for 4 :( I felt so terrible. Its been so hard concentrating on just one thing lately that I get all flustered and annoyed with myself. For instance, BOYS, they are and then they aren't worth it. Then their are friends who I care a lot about and worry about and feel bad for, even when I'm told that there is no reason to worry or feel bad. I can't help it. I think I was made to care and to worry. Then there are friends who bring up the past and all the lovely things I miss and also all the things I don't miss every time I talk to them. I'm trying to live in the present and as lovely as the past was and as sad as it was I don't need to linger on them, not when I'm having a hard enough time staying in the present. Then there is the fact that I promised myself that I would work out more and stay on a diet. Well it didn't happen :( and it makes me so mad at myself. I know that it takes time and that everyday will be a challenge,it just makes me sad. Then there is my foot and all the crap that keeps happening with it. I really hope that it gets better, cause I would love to go at least a full year with no pain. That's all I've been in for 2 years is pain and it would be nice to not have some. Whats sad is that all this is going on in my head all at once, everyday :( I hope typing it all out can relieve some of the fogginess. Well that's life right now!

The blow off!!!

2010-02-18T12:53:00.001-08:00

I don't really know why this is, but for some strange reason when a girl gets her first boyfriend she then turns her entire life around for him :( I know this to be true because,well, I've done it and the sad thing is when I did it, I didn't have any real friends around to forget about or to blow off. But it has happened to me. I was blown off by a close friend all because she got her first boyfriend. Don't you think that's sad? Why do we do this to our friends. We had plans to hang out and to talk about the new boyfriend for over a week. I told her that she shouldn't blow off her girlfriends just cause she has a boyfriend. I'm not really mad anymore because we have planned to hang out next week now, but I just really hope that everyone who ever accidentally blew off a girlfriend for a boy or has been blown off, it hurts so just remember to think and plan better cause a simple "oh I forgot" can really hurt a friendship. I still love my friend, and hope it never happens again, and I can't really help it lol I just love pretty much everyone lol :)

Profound?

2010-01-27T23:26:00.000-08:00

I just watched a movie on the tube and it was about 18 teenage girls getting pregnant in a small town in Massachussetts. Its based on a true story. 3 of the pregnant girls made a pact to get pregnant after a close friend of theirs got pregnant. That movie really made me think about my life in high school. I can honestly say that I knew about maybe 3 pregnancies during my entire high school experience. I shake my head right now cause I wonder (why?) I'm not a perfect person and I've done some really dumb things in my lifetime, but I've never thought about or planned or even wanted to trick a guy into getting me pregnant. I really hope that young girls and boys will think about what will happen after they choose to have sex at such a youg age. I will never say that having a baby is a mistake no matter the cituation, but when your careless with your own life how do you expect to care for an innocent childs life? Back in high school I don't ever remember thinking about having a child. I just wanted to graduate so that I could get out of there as fast as I could. I don't know why I'm posting this. I'm not in high school anymore and I don't know anyone who is still in high school, but hopefully the world will remember that epidemics such as 18 teenage girls getting pregnant before the are even graduated from high school are preventable. A child should be conceived when two responsible adults are married and can take care of the child. It saddens me when I see a child on the news and their mother locks them in a closet while she goes off to work because she can't afford day care. That really happened and in our great state of AZ. I feel so sorry for those kids. It makes me cry and want to help them even when I can't afford to do so myself. I pray for everyone that they learn and do what is right and chooses to use their brain when making those right choices..

7 Things!!

2010-01-23T19:57:00.000-08:00

So My dear good friend Krissa told me that I should blog about 7 things that no one knows about me. Well, I will try my hardest to not embarrass myself, here it goes....

When I'm having a hard time whether it be family, friends, work, or just life in general, I love to eat a toasted peanut butter & jelly sandwhich. When I bite into one when there are hard times it seems like the peanut butter and jelly go to battle for me and make everything A-Okay.
I've had a book sitting next to my bed half read for 3 months :( I know how lame is it I feel horrible. Its a great read, I need to find the time or just remind myself that its there and its not finished yet!
I'm probably way more obsessed with planning for my very future wedding than I am actually making it possible for me to have one Lol I love looking at wedding gowns and flowers and all the types of colors there are and the decorations. I just like the idea of one day it will happen :)
I really don't like people much. Now I don't say that to be mean, but when I first meet someone I do my hardest to smile and be polite and I don't do that cause its the right thing to do, but because I don't want to be mean. It takes me awhile to warm up to people, and eventually we become good friends. If we don't then life goes on the way it always has gone on :)
I really want to get rid of my tattoo's. I think they are ugly even though they aren't offensive or anything, but I would rather not have them. My family and a lot of other people love tattoo's and when I'm around them its so hard for me to speak out about not wanting them anymore cause I don't want to start anything.
I love watching movies!! I absolutely am obsessed with movies! I espescially love WAR movies or anything that deals with culture of another country other than my own. Its fascinating.
Even though I don't like people much I am also the oppisite everyone that I'm friends with I love :) Its like a natural thing with me. So remember this, even though we don't talk much or we don't hang out or see each other I CARE ABOUT YOU :)

Okay thats it lol :)

Good Bye 2009, and Hello 2010

2010-01-04T20:53:00.000-08:00

To my suprise I actually kept my new years resolution for 2009 :) It was to have fun no matter what happend and to be happy in times of saddness. I think I did a pretty good job with it. Somethings that happened this past year was.....

I became a friend others could rely on.
I became a bit more selfless(not bragging).
Fell in love the first time (then it turned into a different kind of love).
Learned to be more positive with things.
Had like 7 eye candies.
and.... Became grateful for for every little thing in my life.

Those are just a few things, but I look forward to 2010, because I believe that this next year will be great if I make it great and I intend to do just that!

New Job!!!

2009-12-30T12:54:00.000-08:00

Yes it is true! I got a new job :) I'm happy that I have one. I now work for an in-home care company that sends CNA's out to patients homes to help care for them. I've had this job for about 3 weeks now and its been really interesting. I'm not allowed to work full time and that is why I'm not back at the hospital. This new job is kind of perfect for me right now and I believe that Heavenly Father wants me to have it. So I will tell ya how I got it.

My boss found my resume on careerbuilder.com and called me so I could go in to fill out an application. Well I needed to have a TB test done and take a First-Aide/ CPR class before I could even be qualified for the job. So I got the test done and took the classes and the following Monday I called him back and I was asked to go in for an interview. So it was set for that Friday at 11:30am. I got there 10 minutes early, you know I would rather be early than late! So I go in and introduce myself and the receptionist hands me a huge packet. My thoughts were"Holy crap! That's the application?" I handed the receptionist all the forms of I.D. that I had brought with me. She instructed me to go into the small room off to the side of her desk and to fill out all the papers, so I did. I get in there and the first few pages seem like a normal application, then after like the 7th page I started to recognize some of the papers. They were new-hire papers. I at first thought it was a mistake but continued to fill them all out. It took about an hour :( The receptionist came in, took the papers, and then told me to stand with my back to the wall. I asked why? She said..."For your employee I.D :)" Yeah I at that point couldn't stop smiling. I didn't even have an interview! So after my picture was taken she told me to wait a few for my boss to come in. He wanted to discuss some things with me. Well he gets in and starts talking about the pay and the types of clients I will have and time sheets. LOL! When he was done I smiled and said.." I honestly was only expecting an interview not to get hired :)" I'm a dork of course and I think he could see that. He then told me how the amount of experience that I had was more than enough and that I was clearly more than experienced in the health care business so they wanted to hire me. I was kind of shocked about the whole thing, but I prayed and fasted and had faith that Heavenly Father would help me in his own time :)

So that's that! Got a job and life seems to be going good :)

December 2nd 2007 VS December 2nd 2009

2009-11-30T12:38:00.000-08:00

On December 2nd 2007 I decided to meet some friends at the Temple to enjoy in the lights. Well needless to say I didn't make it to the Temple that night. I was in a car accident that injured me and forced me to realize what was really going on in my life and how I really was doing with things like finances. It was like a slap in the face. For the next year, my foot heel healed and I went back to work. Also I got my finances in order and back on track with a lot of spiritual things too. The working didn't last long though. My Dr. didn't want me to be on my foot for more than 15 minutes every hour. I was working at a hospital, there was no way I could do that. The Dr. found arthritis inbetween the joints of my ankle and said that surgery was needed if I wanted to walk with no pain and no limp,but I had to wait a full year after the break of my heel to have the surgery. Well I waited and then I wait a little longer for insurance to approve the surgery. On July 16th, 2009 I had the surgery, a full year and 7 months after the car accident. Its been a long road to get myself back on track health wise and now I'm finding it hard to get myself back on track work wise and financially. Its a hard time and all I can do is try. During all this I developed friendships and I learned a lot about the person that I want to be and I learned how to be a leader and so much about the gospel. Its amazing when in a class I can raise my hand to answer a question and it would be the right answer. I love my testimony and its helped me stay strong and get through so much. The friendships that I've developed are the type of friendships that I will have for all eternity. I'm so grateful for everyone in my life. I really am :) I honestly have love for everyone. So this December 2nd, 2009 I am happy to know that everything I'm doing in my life are the right things :)

Its begining to look a lot like Christmas!!!!

2009-11-30T12:22:00.000-08:00

Okay, so one of my favorite times of year is...Christmas!!!! I love the decorations,the food,and I love when the family gets together to enjoy the Christmas spirit, that loves to consume us all. My family has already put Christmas lights up and we are decorating the inside now. It is going to look AWESOME. No one else does Christmas lights on my street so my house has to make up for it. And it does a great job too :) Last year for some reason it took me a while to get in the Christmas spirit and this year I've been in it since November 14th. My Dad has opened our house up for a Christmas party that we normally have at my Aunt and Uncles house. So this means that the eliptical and the stationary bike will be moved into my room for the month of December for the Christmas tree. My room isn't that big :( But it should be fun, since my Dads side of the family is all coming and a few of my Mom's. The only thing that is a downer is that its on December 19th. That is the same day as the Multi-Stake Christmas Activity at my stake building. That means that I need to be there and to conduct. I'm grateful though, that the party is at night and the activity is during the day. I just wont be able to help set up the house the day of. Which means my mother will want me to set it up the night before LOL, But I do love the Christmas time. I feel bad though that I don't have a job right now and that I wont be able to give gifts to many people. I feel that for the past 2 years I've done nothing, but take and I haven't been able to give back, Granted I was in a position that I needed to be dependant upon those around me. That is a later post though. Okay so MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!!! I can say it now since tomorrow is December 1st :)

To all those who need a hug or some words of advice :)

2009-10-05T12:50:00.000-07:00

Today I've been thinking a lot about Satan and the impact that he's having on a lot of people. This weekend was General Conference, and what I got out of it is that we all need to continue to have unwavering faith in Christ and to remember that 'Love' isn't just for our families, but also for our friends and ward families and all those who are in need of it. I honestly Love each and every person I know. There are different types of Love and I'm so grateful to experience those different types. Satan is very cunning and he doesn't want us to have joy and love. He doesn't want us to have friends that can help us when he gets to us. If we were all alone, then we all would be in that together. No one is the same and we are all different for a reason. Satan knows that he will put you down to the lowest you can get. Remember that when he does that, that he's doing it because he knows what can make you that low. I used to think I was the most ugliest person I know. True I did think that, it wasn't that long ago that I thought that either, But those words "ugly'/'being loved' were the words that could make me feel low. I'm not ugly, I know I'm not, and I am loved. I may not have my eternal companinons love, but I know I will some day and I'm looking forward to it. Satan is not dumb, but he has weaknesses just like us and if we are willing to fight against him and his cruel intentions, then we will have the strength of the Lord helping us in that fight. So to all those who are feeling down, I love you and know you are worth being loved and capable of repressing Satan's power.

Family!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

2009-09-25T21:58:00.001-07:00

So why is it that I chose to be a part of this family? I would really like to know. My family just never seems to give me a break. I guess its true when they say that love is an adventure. It's not a decision you make for others. It's a decision you make from your heart. I do love my family, but when I look at them it makes me cling to the gospel and the principles that the church has. I'm glad to know where I can turn for the peace that I deserve. I just wish it wasn't so hard. I know if I look at the example of Jesus Christ and the Atonement I know that the things that I go through are little to the ones that The savior had gone through. I'm just really wanting out of my families home. I know that I get stronger every day when I live the gospel and choose the right.

What can I do? I'm only in a wheelchair!!!!

2009-08-29T00:36:00.000-07:00

So tonight was like any other night except I wasn't with my good friend Krissa :( Totally missed her though!! I happened to be with my other friend Elizabeth :) We decided to escape from our prison's called home and go to the dollar theater at Superstition Springs Mall. Our showing was for the 9:40pm Star Trek!! We both hadn't seen it and decided that it was probably going to be AWESOME. Since our movie didn't start until 9:40pm we decided to wander the mall and look at some stuff. Elizabeth needed to buy a new under shirt and I love looking at accessories. I actually bought a necklace that's hot pink and new silver earrings,well the earrings were cheap and broke about 20 minutes ago, anyways we wanted to get something to eat real quick so we went to the food court and had a quick bite, on a side note I absolutely love 'Paradise Bakery' So we finished and saw it was time to go to our movie. We got there and noticed a man(without a shirt on) and a women sitting in the first couple seats on the right side with 2 young boys. Of course I needed the handy-capped spot and we sat in the most top row in the first 2 seats, me being in the outer chair. Right before our movie started the man was asked by security to 'Please put on a shirt'. Well our movie was starting and about 30 minutes into the movie the man I had mentioned before decided that he needed to voice every thought that came into his head. I naturally thought that he might just be showing off for his girl,but nope, I was dead wrong! During the ENTIRE movie that man made vulgar comments about some of his body parts and used the 'F-word' every other word. I'm quite used to hearing it, but I seriously thought that I had never heard it used more in 2 hours than my entire life! By this time a few people tried staring at him and some shushed him,but that did no good. Finally I decided to take action and I bravely got up and into my wheelchair and left the theater to find a manager. I had enough of hearing the things coming out of his mouth. I of course told the manager and while they went to talk with him I used the restroom, and call my older and big tough brother,Jason, on my cell. I pretty much told him that I might die for telling on that man.He of course laughed at me for doing what my mother taught me to do. On my way back to the theater I passed the manager and they said that they spoke with him and told him if he didn't stop that he would have to leave. Well I got into the theater and the man asked me "Hey, do you need any help?" I of course replied " No thank you, I got it" and smiled. You think that was the end of his little show? Wrong!! Way wrong. He then decided that it would be much more fun to just make every comment he had about me. He said things like"I'm gonna take that wheelchair and do 360's and go down hills and have sex in it and take it from me." My maternal instincts towards my wheelchair took over and I swiftly folded it up and took hold of it firmly. A few minutes of silence took over but didn't last long. He then got up and came over to me and did something I wasn't expecting he said"I'm sorry about what I said, I can be a jerk" He then shook mine and Elizabeth's hands. We nodded at him and he left. I suddenly and instinctively wiped my hand on my pants. I remembered what he had said about his body parts :( I know that's disgusting. A short time later the movie ended and as a few people were leaving a few of them came to me and asked me if I had been fighting with the man? I told them the truth and said no and that I didn't know the man at all and was just tired of hearing his vulgar mouth. They said thanks and told me good job for standing up to him. I laughed at that cause its not like standing is an easy thing for me at the moment :) I wish so that the tail had ended there, but of course it doesn't. We got to the parking lot and there was my good old friend yelling at his lady friend and hurting her physically. Elizabeth and I were concerned about leaving her alone with him. My sympathy for people who put themselves in the life of someone like that is very slim. But non-the-less, We waited to see what would happen. What did happen was... Someone had called the cops (not me or Elizabeth) someone from the movie theaters, I think. Well they came and handled the situation. We left, not wanting to be in over our heads. It was a very exciting night and it was fun at the same time. I hope that guy can change his ways and same with that girl. I hated having to be the one to stand up (so-to-speak) to him. But honestly sitting there and listening to that guy it did frighten me that he might do something to me. I had heavenly father there with me. I did! I know it, I asked him to help me be brave enough to stop him from being obscene. I love my life. It is hard to say that sometimes, but I know that things happen for a reason and I truly hope that if anyone ever sees or hears, what I saw and heard, that they too will do what they can to stop it. It was an adventure, and I did it all in a wheelchair!!! :)

The Longing and Tragedy!!!

2009-08-17T13:42:00.000-07:00

I wrote these about a year ago :) I hope you like them!!

The Longing-

Some say that the longing for something/someone is only the art of wanting what was once there, but the truth to it is, that you actually long for the things that make your toes curl,your heart race,and gut wrenching feelings and the people who have impacted your life on an astronomical level where you cannot define them as anything other than important to you. I believe that as we engage ourselves in the art of longing we become those feelings and just as important to ourselves and those around us that it would be hard to actually never long for them. So if we all take a part in the art of longing we are able to see that its a lot like love and being loved and giving love.

-Amanda Branson

Tragedy-

Tragedies happen! What are you going to do? Give up, quit? NO! When your heart breaks you have to fight like hell to stay alive. Cause you are, and the pain that your feeling, thats life and the confusion and fear thats there, is to remind you that somewhere out there, there is something better and its worth the fight! As we strain to grasp the things we desire with what we think will make our lives better, we ignore what truely matters like, friendships, family, love. The things we probably already had. Yes, losing your hearts desire is tragic, but gaining it is all you can hope for. If having love is tragic then give me tragedy, I wouldn't give it up for anything!

-Amanda Branson

I wrote this tell me what you think!!

2009-08-08T15:04:00.000-07:00

Okay so one morning about a week ago I stayed up to watch the sunrise. I don't know what came over me but I hurriedly grabbed paper and a marker(The only thing near me) and wrote this down....

Today is August 1st and for the first time in a long time I watched the sun rise. Its almost a whisper of light before the breaking of dawn. Sitting and staring out the window with the morning breeze flowing through the leaves on the late summer trees, I think today will be a beautiful day. As a wave of light touches the morninig sky and brightens the day with an eternal glow, I know that life is a creation that knows no end. Today is August 1st and I'm glad fo it to begin.

-Amanda Branson

Its different but I have no idea why I thought of these things. It helps to write down your thoughts no matter how different they are.

Wow surgey lol its been a little over a week!!!

2009-07-27T11:44:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone its been a little over a week since my surgey and I would really love to say that I'm doing great but I'm of course miserable lol its life hopefully I will be doing better soon. I just really wish time would fly lol :)

It Feels Like Home

2009-07-04T00:34:00.000-07:00

I've heard this song probably 5 times before tonight and I've never really stopped and listened to the words until now.I saw the movie "My sisters Keeper" that movie was really interesting and emotional. This song was playing and I thought to myself 'WOW! thats a beautiful song!' and it is. I hope you enjoy it!!

It Feels Like Home -By Chantal Kreviazuk

Somethin' in your eyes,
makes me wanna lose myself
Makes me wanna lose myself, in your arms
There's somethin' in your voice,
makes my heart beat fast
Hope this feeling lasts, the rest of my life

If you knew how lonely my life has been
And how long I've been so alone
And if you knew how I wanted someone to come along
And change my life the way you've done

It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I'm all the way back where I come from
It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong

A window breaks, down a long, dark street
And a siren wails in the night
But I'm alright, 'cause I have you here with me
And I can almost see, through the dark there is light

Well, if you knew how much this moment means to me
And how long I've waited for your touch
And if you knew how happy you are making me
I never thought that I'd love anyone so much

It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I'm all the way the back where I come from
It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong
It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong

Terrible... MONDAYS

2009-06-29T23:02:00.001-07:00

So today is Monday and it started pretty normal. I had my list of chores I had to do and another list of what I had to help the kids do. By the time we got done it was 1pm. Of course we stopped at noon to have lunch :) By 3:15pm I thought it was going to be a pretty nice day. Then I got the mail and noticed that there was a letter in their from my soon to be ex-sister-in-law. Okay so let me back up to about October 2006 just to fill you in on some things.

My Brother and his wife Jennifer in spring of 2006 started to do drugs :( sad I know, My parents found out about it in the summertime of 2006, by October 2006 my parents had convinced both my Brother and his wife to let them have guardianship over the 3 kids to let them have insuraunce since my brother couldn't afford healthcare at that time. Well one day I came home from work around 11:00pm and found in the living room 3 kids sleeping next to my Dad. I woke him up and he told me how Jason and Jenn got into a fight and the cops were called and how Jason was in jail and Jenn was on the run. Drugs do destroy families!! From that day on those three kids have lived with my parents and I. They have been a constant joy to me and my parents. Since 2007 my Brother has been clean and getting his life turned back on the right track. He's doing a great job. Jenn on the otherhand has not. She just barely went to rehab for a suicide attempt. Its so sad.

Today I thought she sent a letter asking to see the kids or something, but when I opened it, inside were court papers petitioning to have the guardianship terminated from my parents :( It breaks my heart to not want to let them go with her, but they have been doing really great these past 3 years. Their happy and you can see it on their faces and in their actions and speech. She ticks me off by waiting to give us these court papers until there is only a week until the court date (even though she has known about it since the first of June). I love those kids very much and can't and wont give them up. My parents can't and wont and their father knows what is best for them better than their mother does. During the past 3 years she has only seen them like 5 times. What mother could go that long without talking or seeing their children? I pity her for her cowardness and her inability to do what is right. It is possible for her to better herself, but she literally, like 2 months ago, tried to kill herself!! She is not ready to be a Mother of 3 children again. I'm heartbroken and sad. My parents are really baffled that she would actually try this. For her sake and the kid's I hope she fails. Those kids don't deserve to have their lives torn apart again. She shouldn't put that much responsibility on herself. I'm terrified for these kids and love them with all that Iam I just had to get this off my chest!!

I'm Feelin Hot...Hot...Hot!!!!!!

2009-06-29T22:44:00.000-07:00

Oh the cleverness of me!! I went to Big Surf this past Saturday w/ Krissa and a few friends and of course we wore sun-block :( Like it helped any, I have very fair skin and so when I say I burned, I seriously mean burned to a crisp! I'm not the only one. Infact I'm pretty sure everyone we went with burned. It was fun though!!

And later that night we went to a party in an airplane hanger!!! I'm serious!! I think I would've had more fun if I actually knew more than 2 people there. But it was fun to see it done.

Sunday has to be one of the best days of the past month!! I saw my friend Cody's mom!! She is such a loving person. When I visited her she said she had something for me from Cody! My heart did 3 flips and stopped dead when she gave it to me. He sent me a tape :) lol I'm such a nerd, but can you blame a girl for being excited to receive a tape from a close friend who she hadn't heard from since he left the MTC for Colombia 20 days ago!! I was worried and I miss him everyday. Being friends with him made me a better person. I cherish our friendship very much! That is my recent news lol :)

SURGERY

2009-06-27T00:21:00.000-07:00

Wow!! I have waited more than a year and in 19 days I will be on the mend and looking toward the future. My surgery is on JULY 16Th!!! I'm nervous and excited all at the same time.I got this packet today from my really cute DOCTOR-that is a member of my church ;)but I have never seen a ring on the man's finger to know if he is single!! - The packet tells of all the types of things to expect before-during-after the surgery. Some of it is a little scary.Some, I pretty much rolled my eyes at. They are going to be scraping out all the arthritis that formed in between the joints of my ankle and then be putting two screws in to fuse the joints together. One screw will be going down into the ankle and the heel and the Second screw will be put in from the bottom of the heel into the ankle. I will be completely out during this, but that is what scares me. There are many cases where people don't wake up from the anesthesia, or they have bad side affects. My mom,of course, will be at the hospital with me. That's a comfort and a blessing, she wont let them do anything the aren't not supposed to do! I love her! I won't be wasting the days by counting down to the day, but trying to have as much fun on my two feet as possible until I can only have fun on one foot :)

Love Remains The Same!!

2009-06-23T13:07:00.000-07:00

I absolutely love this song. It has pretty much helped me out everyday in my life, that I feel compelled to share it with you all!!

Love Remains The Same lyrics- By Gavin Rossdale

A thousand times I’ve seen you standing
Gravity like a lunar landing
Make me want to run till I find you

I shut the world away from here
Drift to you, you’re all I hear
Everything we know fades to black

Half the time the world is ending
Truth is I am done pretending

I never thought that I had anymore to give
Pushing me so far
Here I am without you
Drink to all that we have lost
Mistakes we have made
Everything will change
But love remains the same

Find the place where we escape
Take you with me for a space
The city buzz, sounds just like a fridge
I walk the streets through seven bars
I had to find just where you are
The faces seems to blur, they’re all the same

Half the time the world is ending
Truth is I am done pretending

I never thought that I had anymore to give
Pushing me so far
Here I am without you
Drink to all that we have lost
Mistakes we have made
Everything will change
But love remains the same

So much more to say
So much to be done
Don’t you trick me out
We shall overcome
So all have stayed in place
We should have had the sun
Could have been inside
Instead we’re over here

Half the time the world is ending
Truth is I am done pretending
Too much time, too long defending
You and I are done pretending

I never thought that I had anymore to give
Pushing me so far
Here I am without you
Drink to all that we have lost
Mistakes we have made
Everything will change
Everything will change

I, oh I,
I wish this could last forever
I, oh I,
I As if we could last forever
Love remains the same

Love remains the same

Oh My Gosh!!!

2009-06-18T13:51:00.000-07:00

Lets just say TERMITES!!! I no longer have a window or an outside wall on my house. Its been about 17 years since we put the wood in and now its ruined!!!

Here's the updated life of me!!!!!!!!!

2009-06-16T10:52:00.000-07:00

WOW Its really been like a year since I last blogged!! That is just terrible! Okay, so to catch up on what you all have missed over the past year is........I'm not working right now, I have to have foot surgery(After like 3-4 months of fighting with the insurance company!!) Its for the best, and I will in reality be on the bench for a good 3-4 months! Ya, thats life, I'm still living with my parents :/ Its not to bad! I have been to a total of about 15 wedding receptions in the past year and a half, My friends have been bit by the love-bug! Me on the other hand? Lets just say that I'm interested in anyone who is interested in me, but I have no bite marks and there hasn't been a guy thats come along who also had been bitten and interested in me. Its okay though I'm bidding my time, you really never know whats going to happen until it does so its all good!! I have a few new sayings one is actually an old one but I had stopped saying it cause, well, I really don't know, but anyways, here they are................You smell like cabbage!!! He is the cheese to my macaronni!! Go fly a kite!!! Oh dream big!!Ha ha ha ha :) Thats pretty much it though. LOL, you know me I'm not very predictable but very funny!!

So lets see I will tell ya next about the past year, I am still friends with the greatest two people ever!!! Camille/Mike, they are doing pretty good, they have a house now and 3 dogs, they are still trying to have a kid, but it will happen when its supposed to! I love them, they keep me sane. Without them I would've gone crazy these past few months. And by saying that brings me to my next set of news. There names are Cody and Elizabeth. I've been mediocre friends with elizabeth for the past 2 years, that is up until December 2009. I was at that time talking and friends with Cody. I still am, but he left in April for his mission. I miss him very much. And Elizabeth, she is back in Idaho going to school, she will be home in July. I miss her too. We three were the "The Three muskateers" we pretty much hung out like every day/night for about 4 months. And of course being in a friendship with a guy and a girl, we had our disagreements about a lot of things. But they were fun and they were there whenever I needed them. My feelings for Cody lol lets just say I liked him very much, but am so glad that he is my friend!! I'm glad to have friends!!! Which brings me to my next thing. You remember me stating the amount of receptions I had gone to over the past year or so? Well up until about 2 weeks ago I hadn't talked to pretty much any of my friends after they were married. Now, let me set it straight, I did try to keep in contact with them all but they really didn't try to keep in contact with me. I'm pretty much over it now, cause I don't like being disappointed in my friends. This is me giving them the benefit of the doubt :) Well other than that I love my friends very much. Which brings me to another set of news :) For the past few weeks I've had the pleasure of becoming closer friends with Krissa :) She is a very fun person and very smart too. She makes it pretty easy to be yourself around and not at all hard to talk to. Its fun :)

Patti Broughton though lol :) She is like the second mom that everybody would love to have. She is my friend and like family. She has helped me in more ways than I can describe. I'm so grateful for her and all that she and her husband Les has done for me. I hold a special place in my heart for them. She needs surgery on her heart in about a week. I hope and pray that she will be fine. She will need a lot of help recovering though. I will try my best to help out. Well my family, of course, is the same. They love to infuriate me and they love me all at the same time. They are lucky that they have what they have, but to often, I think, take it for granted. Don't get me wrong, I love them very much, but life isn't about finding yourself! Its about creating yourself. I also love my niece and nephews. They try to keep the long days fun for everyone. They are getting big though lol :) My brother Jeremy came home for a few days and now he is back in Hawaii. My sister moved to Colorado with her dumb boyfriend. Bill is in South Dakota living with my grandparents, he is doing pretty good. Brian is still a pain in the rear end, but he is doing okay too. Jason is doing loads better lol, He has been trying to get on the right track for a while now and he did it! Me on the other hand lol I'm having foot surgery in exactly one month :/ I'm terrified!! It will be okay I know this, but its still a cause for concern. Well I think I've written enough to let you all know of whats what in my life. I hope you enjoy the material I've given!!!